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PostPosted: Mon Sep 19, 2022 4:28 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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The mere suggestion was enough to make Sirius’ face heat up further, even if it had been exactly why Sirius had come to talk with Remus, it still felt like too much and like they were both being awfully presumptuous about the intentions of the other person.
Still though, Sirius did what he could to collect himself enough to actually make the request he so wanted to.
“I do,” he ended up bursting out, far removed from the easy and elegant request he had thought that he would be able to make, but he realised that if he wanted to put his cards on the table it was going to have to be like this.
“I mean… if you want to then, yeah, I do,” he stated, looking down at his socked feet and all but begging for the ground to swallow him, so desperate for this conversation to be over with, one way or another.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 10:36 am 

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While the offer had been entirely genuine, Remus hadn’t expected such an ardent response, let alone one that came so quickly. It turned his mind to static with the surprise with which it struck him, once again forcing his eyes onto Sirius, needing to steady himself on something.
Remus would have asked him to repeat himself, but Sirius didn’t look like he had it in him to say it a third time.
“Alright,” he eventually replied, a little taken aback by how quickly they had managed to change something that was fundamental in their friendship.
Remus had offered that option up freely and willingly, now and yesterday alike, and still Sirius appeared in front of him like he had asked too much of Remus, making Remus feel compelled to repeat himself more steadfastly.
It made a smile pull at his lips, as he turned away from his desk a second, more final time. By no means was it a bad change between them, his interest quickly piqued.
“Yeah, of course, I’d love to.”


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 1:23 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Even though this had been what Sirius wanted, he found that he was woefully unprepared to have Remus offer it so easily and seeming so willing to actually have sex with him. It made him feel a little giddy, feeling so absolutely silly from talking so seriously about something that, in his experience, should require far less talking. It made his head spin and made him feel uncertain which leg to stand on.
“Yeah?” He found himself asking, unsure on how to progress from here, feeling like he had managed to talk himself into a corner and unsure how to get out of it again.
He desperately wanted Remus to take control of the situation, knowing that he likely knew much better what to do now, but he felt uncertain of how to ask for that, so he decided to simply stay silent, not wanting to make an even bigger fool of himself.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 1:45 pm 

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“Yeah,” Remus assured, unable to entirely keep a laugh from his voice.
He had wanted Sirius yesterday when it was all insistent and ablaze, and he found that he didn’t want him any less now, as Sirius stood in front of him seemingly unable to look him in the eye. There was something undeniably captivating about the shyness of his actions in the way it contrasted with the intent with which Sirius had entered this conversation.
Remus shifted forward in his chair, a thoughtless attempt to bridge the distance between them.
“Did you have anything in mind?”
Remus asked out of curiosity, his voice an invitation. It was apparent that Sirius had given it some thought since they parted last night, and Remus was keen to hear what particularly had tipped the scale.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 2:34 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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While Sirius had definitely given it a lot of thought and had returned to the dorm with a purpose, he found that he had absolutely nothing coherent to offer now that he was being asked.
The only true conclusion he had come to during his time at the library was that he wanted Remus, but he didn’t exactly had a proper frame of reference for what that even meant for him. In fact, he wasn’t even entirely sure if he could enjoy sex, but he still felt so drawn to Remus that it felt like it would be worth it to give it a go.
“I don’t know,” he admitted, tugging at the sleeve of his shirt once more, having all this pent up energy that he had no idea where to put and still feeling too nervous to properly look up.
He did manage to steal a glance up at Remus though, floored by his easy smile and his obvious eager to make sure that Sirius would get what he wanted. It made him feel dizzy, unaccustomed to having someone be so keen on making sure that he got a good experience.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 3:25 pm 

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Coming to rest his forearms against his knees, Remus couldn’t help but smile. He felt quite sure Sirius must have given it enough thought to think in specifics, but whether or not he wanted - or felt like he could - share that insight with Remus was entirely different. While he hoped Sirius one day might feel compelled to share, Remus had no intention of pushing for it.
“S’alright,” he promised with a smile, straightening his posture a little. “We’ll figure it out.”
Sirius looked about to burst, and though some of it was nervousness, it also felt like an expression of restraint. Remus’ hands itched to smooth over the tension building within Sirius, a thrilled little smile pulling at his lips at the prospect of getting to offer Sirius that outlet.
“Is now a good time?” Remus felt like he had to ask, though the ridicule wasn’t entirely lost on him, a smile still audible in his voice.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2022 3:36 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Sirius was beyond relieved when Remus took charge and assured him that it was alright, even if Sirius still felt beyond embarrassed about the entire situation. He was so unused to having to voice his desires and it didn’t really surprise him that Remus was used to something quite different.
He was mostly just relieved and slowly starting to feel more at ease, happy with his decision to do this with Remus, even if he wasn’t sure how to voice that.
“Yes,” he said, fully able to recognise the ridicule of the situation, but he really couldn’t find a way to properly voice his desires, so it felt easier if he could just answer whichever questions Remus would come up with and then they could take it from there.
“Now is good,” he felt the need to confirm, wanting Remus to know that he was indeed enthusiastic about this, he just didn’t have the language for it.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 3:57 am 

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Almost thoughtlessly, Remus nodded. This was another turning point in their relationship, a final little confirmation that this wasn’t just something Sirius wanted in theory, but something he wanted now. No matter how often Remus found himself in similar situations, this felt new in a way that made his stomach flip. The amount of trust Sirius was putting onto Remus was suffocating in the best way possible, warm and deafening.
“Good,” he returned with a smile, and he realized the thrill was a testament to the fact that, for the first time in ages, this wasn’t a business transaction.
Coming to a stand, Remus glanced towards his desk and then his hands, an instinctive confirmation that he wasn’t approaching this with ink stained fingers. When his eyes returned to Sirius, his expression was open, happy to let Sirius in and to blur that line between them.
“Wanna pick up where we left off?” he asked, his voice half a joke, caught between wanting to do good by Sirius and not showing too much reverence.
A smile still played on his lips as he stopped a step from Sirius, fingers touching his elbow in the first attempt to bridge the distance between them. “Can I kiss you?”


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 12:56 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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As Remus approached, Sirius felt his heart flip in his chest, barely able to believe that it could be this easy, that Remus wanted him the same way that Sirius wanted him. When Remus reached out and touch him, even if it was just a touch to his elbow, he felt convinced that this had been the right decision.
He knew that he could trust Remus, feeling absolutely certain that while this might not change Sirius’ mind about sex he was still going to be safe and taken properly care of. He couldn’t really ask for much more than that and it sent a thrill through him, knowing that he had only just barely voiced his desire but he still felt that it had been huge for him.
“Yes,” he managed, cheeks still hot but feeling slightly less embarrassed about it now, feeling like he could better agree to getting kissed than to anything else.
“Please,” he also found it himself to add, not wanting there to be any doubt in Remus about whether or not he wanted this.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 1:53 pm 

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Remus’ touch was a soft one, the way his fingers trailed a few inches up the underside of Sirius’ upper arm, a gentle invitation for Sirius to reach for him. While Remus doubted Sirius was going to be able to shake his nervousness entirely, it was in their shared interest to dispel the air of hesitancy that hung between them, wanting Sirius to feel welcome to touch him.
As Remus instead reached for Sirius’ waist, it felt propelled by muscle memory, finding that the memory of yesterday still remained at the forefront of his consciousness. It made it so easy to bridge the gap between them.
Although it had been plenty established that today their proximity carried a purpose, the kiss Remus pressed onto Sirius’ lips wasn’t a demand for more, no urgency behind his touch.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 2:07 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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When Remus kissed him so softly Sirius almost felt like weeping, feeling no rush in the caress and instead feeling comfortable in placing his hands on Remus’ upper arms, returning the kiss with the same care that Remus seemed to be putting into it.
It still felt almost too good to be true, almost as if he didn’t deserve to be treated this kindly but Sirius desperately wanted to believe that this was actually for him.
He allowed himself to sink into Remus’ embrace, leaning against him and stretching just slightly to be able to properly reciprocate the kiss. This part was easy and something that Sirius had always found enjoyable, enjoying the closeness and the intimacy which helped him relax into what he had started.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 2:59 pm 

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No matter how much this felt like picking back up where they had left off, Remus was entirely aware of the ways that it wasn’t. There was no longer a taste of wine on Sirius’ lips, and in that moment, Remus realized it perhaps had been for the better to wait, the sweetness of Sirius’ request amplified by its sobriety.
Displacing the kiss by an inch, Remus’ lips brushed against the corner of Sirius’ mouth.
“Let’s get in bed, yeah?” he suggested, leisurely in the way he punctuated the question with a kiss to Sirius’ jaw, a grin audible in the way his breath hitched. “Wanna make you feel good.”


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2022 3:23 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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When Remus turned is head slightly Sirius almost turned his head with him, not quite ready to not be kissing Remus, but quickly he got distracted by Remus’ words and kisses.
The promise to make him feel good sent a shiver down his spine, his heart pounding in his chest at the prospect. He simply nodded softly, not wanting to displace Remus’ attention from his jaw, and slowly started inching towards his own bed, finding that to be the closest one.
“Alright,” he breathed, still finding the entire situation a little daring, but he so wanted to experience whatever Remus had in mind for him, enjoying his close proximity and figuring that this was about as good as it got.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 5:12 am 

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Sirius’ backwards step allowed him to take a seat first, and it took Remus a stuttered moment not to immediately follow him.
As Sirius’ heigh diminished, Remus’ hands slipped from his waist to the column of Sirius’ neck, thumbs barely touching the line of his jaw. It had only taken them moments for Remus’ skin to feel flushed, his thoughts so busy and disjointed that it felt like a thrum in the back of his mind, not unaffected by the feeling of Sirius’ beneath his hands but needing to keep his bearings as they would, inevitably, venture past a kiss.
“You have to tell me what feels good,” he stressed, not unkindly, but with the growing feeling that Sirius hadn’t taken that point to heart.
Remus’ eyes flickered between Sirius’, a smile slowly pulling at his lips as his grip around Sirius’ jaw grew purposeful, tipping his chin upwards slightly. He leaned closer but not close enough to catch Sirius’ lips in a kiss. “Yeah? I want to know.”


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 5:56 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Sirius felt like he was on shaky ground, sitting on the bed and staring up at Remus, feeling so small and yet so safe in his presence. As he had sat down, his hands had slid down from Remus’ arms to instead land on his hips, a tentative grip, mostly just something to keep Sirius grounded in the moment.
When Remus was suddenly right in front of him it took everything in Sirius to not just bridge the distance between them, feeling safe and comfortable in kissing Remus, but he could also tell that this was important to him and he so wanted to be good as well.
“Alright,” he managed in a soft voice, unsure if that was a promise that he’d be able to keep, but he really wanted to. He knew that he had some hang ups about sex, even worse with talking about it, but Remus was so sweet about it, clearly filling in the gaps where Sirius wasn’t able to do so himself, and for that alone he desperately wanted to be able to tell him what he wanted.
“I’ll try,” he added, cheeks hot and his breathing rapid, trying to keep a level head.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 6:23 am 

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Remus nodded, figuring he wouldn’t be able to ask more of Sirius, not here and now. In other contexts, Remus had seen Mulligan call on him with little warning, Sirius seemingly never off his balance, easily finding the words to defend even the most obscure tangent or consideration. Here, now, Sirius seemed hard pressed to even speak two-syllable words. It would have ingrained a sense of doubt in Remus, had his fingers not rested against the pulse points in Sirius’ necks, feeling the adrenaline rush through Sirius’ veins.
It was intoxicating.
“I’ll ask,” Remus assured with a smile, meeting the expectation half way, not sure if Sirius would be able to speak up unprompted.
The most basic safety net established between them, Remus finally allowed himself to cross the distance between them, catching Sirius’ lips in another kiss, tentative in the way it asked for more.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 6:44 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Once he was being kissed again, it was much easier for Sirius to ease into it, knowing that Remus was good and kind to him. It made his grip tighten slightly on Remus’ hips, eager to keep him close and feeling better about actually going through with the situation that he had started.
He stretched up to meet the kiss, dizzy by the way that Remus was towering above him, their slight height difference suddenly much more than it normally was. It made Sirius realise that he enjoy being the smaller one, not something that he usually got to be, and while it wasn’t be a lot it still thrilled him.
Kissing wash easy and familiar territory, something that Sirius felt comfortable doing so it wasn’t hard for him to meet the kiss with enthusiasm, pleased that he got to show Remus that he wanted him in this way, even if he had a hard time showing it otherwise.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 8:35 am 

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Both sleeping on the school-issued twin beds, the space was unforgivingly narrow, and so Remus took a seat next to Sirius, nowhere left for them to move. It only amplified the juvenile nature of the scene, indeed feeling like school boys having their first go at it.
As the space between them diminished, Sirius’ hands on Remus’ hips lost their sense of purpose; Remus, however, was happy to offer an alternative. Letting his hands fall from Sirius’ face, he caught Sirius’ hands, bringing them to the center line of buttons closing Remus’ cardigan.
Breaking the kiss by tipping his chin down, Remus glanced down his chest, his hands covering Sirius’ as he himself undid a button in an invitation.
“Here,” he encouraged, voice barely audible, before he once again met Sirius’ lips in a kiss.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 9:15 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Sirius barely had time to think.
Suddenly Remus was next to him and his hands were on Remus’ buttons, knowing full well that it was just the buttons on his cardigan, and while it felt overwhelming to him he still obliged; keen to do as Remus asked him to, as he wanted for this to be enjoyable for the both of them.
Grateful for the distraction that the kiss was, Sirius gingerly undid the buttons of Remus’ cardigan, hands shaking slightly, but more from anticipation than from dread.
While Sirius had also wanted Remus the night before, he realised that it had been a good idea to wait, feeling much clearer in his head now and feeling certain that that was going to be making for a much better experience.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2022 9:55 am 

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The feel of hands barely skimming across his chest would never not feel thrilling, although perhaps even more because it was Sirius’. Despite the December chill that crept through the seams of his shirt, the space between them was warm, feeling the nervous anticipation that seemed to radiate from Sirius.
Although he itched for more, for progression, Remus offered no further encouragement, not yet, interested to see if Sirius would go on to undress him unprompted.
Instead, Remus’ hands once again reached loosely for Sirius, his right hand barely brushing against the nape of his neck offering a gentle anchor into the kiss.


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