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PostPosted: Sat Apr 23, 2022 4:24 pm 

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There was a particular ease about regulars, Remus realized. He found himself relaxing easier into the touches, the promises, the questions knowing there was some degree of safety in the interactions - no nasty surprises, although Remus didn’t know his name..
They hadn’t had a set date, but the man had found him regardless, almost immediately upon Remus’ arrival. Some odd thirty minutes later, he had inched closer and Remus had welcomed it.
Remus was nursing a cigarette, looking at the man with juvenile interest, flushed cheeks and grinning. Over the sound of the music, they had talked each other up to the point of their conversation becoming little more than teases. The man had a hand at Remus’ waistband, egging Remus on with wishes and desires, boyishly pleading them to reality with pound bills, stuffing them into Remus’ front pocket, fingers lingering against the thin cotton of the pocket lining.
Despite the boldness of the exchange, Remus was entertained; his free hand lingered on the man’s arm, but the way it curved around his elbow rather than his wrist spoke of an unmistakable encouragement.


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 24, 2022 5:55 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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There was a certain intrigue in getting to watch Remus do his job, something that Sirius had previously only seen in passing, but having never gotten to really linger on it.
Remus looked completely different to how Sirius normally knew him, though his clothes were very much the same only slightly more relaxed. Instead, it was the way that he held himself that made Sirius so infatuated with him, wanting to keep watching him like a moth drawn to a flame.
If he hadn’t already thought Remus to be a handsome man, this surely would have been the thing that would have done it for him. It was not difficult to see how Remus would be good at this job and a part of Sirius desperately wished that it was he who he standing close to him, even if it had meant dropping money into his pocket, if only to get him to look at Sirius like that as well.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2022 2:12 pm 

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Remus’ hadn’t been counting the bills, and yet the sheer volume of cash stuffed into his pocket eventually managed to tip a balance. The cigarette had burned down to the filter, and Remus turned to butt it into the ashtray on the bar, an entertained smile on his lips.
Regular enough to recognize the shift in the conversation, the man Remus was with straightened his posture, ready to leave yet never shifting away from the bar. His hand did, however, slip to Remus’ hip.
Ever careful to toe the line between displaying too much physical affection in public, Remus barely returned the touch, his hand dropping from the man’s elbow to his forearm, a barely-there tug.
The man happily complied.
As they stepped away from the bar, they almost entirely broke any point of contact, Remus quick and apt to shy away from anything resembling an embrace. The man’s hand lingered at his hip, a fleeting touch that failed to maintain proper contact as they walked.
Remus’ attention was undeniably on the man, eyes constantly finding him. There was still a bright smile on his features, comfortable in his company, and it was only when the man pushed the bar door open around Remus’ shoulders, that Remus allowed himself to slot into a proximity resembling an embrace. In doing that, he turned into the man’s open arms, changing to angle in which he viewed the bar.
He felt his heart fall through the floor, his expression faltering, mortified beyond comprehension.
Across the room, at the opposite end of the bar sat Sirius Black, unmistakably even across the distance. Remus felt like he had been smited from above, like he had just tossed away his entire academic career within seconds.
He felt glued to the ground, and before he got enough senses to speak to Black about it, the man had swept him outside with an arm around his waist.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2022 3:04 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Even after watching Remus leave with a handsome stranger, only a twinge of regret that it hadn’t been him, Sirius he managed to enjoy the rest of his night.
Returning to the dorm that he shared with Remus, Sirius hadn’t really been surprised that his flatmate hadn’t returned yet, and not particularly worried about it either. He was absolutely certain that Remus was fully able to handle himself, looking like someone who had been in the game for a while, so he really had no reason to fuss.
Rather than thinking too much of his missing flatmate, Sirius had elected to make a cup of tea, still in the outfit he had worn at the club, having only kicked off the large platform boots that he had been wearing at the door.
As he tried to convince himself to just go to bed, Sirius found it hard to get up from his chair at his desk, cup of tea in hand as he wilfully ignored how late it was.

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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 2:51 am 

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Remus felt like he had been knocked off the surface of the Earth, off-kilter and ungrounded. Regret had flooded through him, having been so close to wrestling out of the man’s embrace to run back to Black. To do what, exactly, he hadn’t know. Cuss him out, cry - beg for his silence, even.
He hadn’t come back to himself before the man kissed him, mercifully allowing the panic to morph into spite, riled into annoyance by the thought that he was expected to be ashamed.
His stomach was still in knots, though, by the time Remus made it back to the dorm several hours later. No matter how he turned it, no matter how he personally felt about his job, Black was still in the position to end Remus’ academic career.
Remus had made a greater attempt to straighten himself out, going as far as to having a quick shower before leaving, but he knew better than to expect that to hide anything. He didn’t know whether to expect Black asleep, but it didn’t matter, having every intention of waking him; Remus felt too certain that his colleague had seen him for them to feign ignorance in the morning.
Despite every sense of annoyance drawing his muscles tight, Remus still stalled when he opened the door to find Black still awake.


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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 12:28 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Sirius hadn’t exactly known when to expect Remus home, despite having worked closely with others in the business for years, Sirius had never really talked a lot about the job with them.
Thus, he was left slightly surprised when the door to their dorm opened and Remus stood there.
“Hullo Remus,” he said in a soft voice, somehow as if he wears afraid of disturbing the quiet of the night around them. Even more so, he wasn’t sure how Remus would even want to be greeted after a night like that, unsure how Remus felt about the entire thing, though he had seemed calm and casual about the entire thing.
Rather than saying anything further, Sirius took a sip from his tea.

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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 2:06 pm 

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Unable to commit to the nonchalant self-certainty he had wanted to convey, the fact that Black was still up and, seemingly, awaiting his return, made Remus’ stomach turn and his jaw clench. He felt like he could sick up. Even though Remus could never have afforded tuition without working, his throat felt tight at the prospect that it could also be the cause for his exclusion.
He had to look away from Black, stepping into the room and shrugging his coat off.
“I’d like a word,” he stated, his voice thick with nerves, but he managed to keep a question out of his words. He’d much rather face it on his own terms than to cower and wait for Black to sip his sodding tea.
Remus tossed his coat off onto his bed, little regard for the late hour of the night. Black was awake after all.


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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 3:02 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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This was a surprise to Sirius more than anything else Remus could have possibly said.
Sirius was positively knackered, having only settled with a cup of tea to wind properly down before heading in for the night, so he couldn’t imagine how tired Remus had to be.
“Oh?” He said, having nothing more intelligent to use to prompt Remus to say what he wanted to say.
It didn’t help that Sirius had no idea what it was about, really not seeing how anything they could talk about would be so important that it couldn’t wait til morning.

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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 3:26 pm 

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Remus ground his teeth, uneasy and frustrated and wrecked, all balled up into an uncomfortable tension. Looking back, Remus had never had to justify his job to others, and having to attempt that conversation now, tonight, with his TA of all people, was almost enough for Remus to quit his doctorate himself.
He looked at Black, sick to his stomach, trying to figure out the shortest possible way through this.
“Sirius, please don’t tell Mulligan,” Remus finally allowed himself to plead, his voice small despite its severity. Remus had no expectations that Black wasn’t smart enough to figure it out, and yet he couldn’t get himself to say it out loud.


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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2022 3:34 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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The absolute desperation that Remus carried in his voice and in his body language was utterly confusing to Sirius. He did know what Remus was talking about, after all it had been pretty apparent what was going on and that Sirius had seen it as well. What he didn’t understand was why Remus suddenly stressed about him potentially telling Mulligan about it.
“Of course I won’t tell Mulligan,” Sirius said with a soft frown on his face as he placed his cup on his desk, wanting to be able to properly look at Remus, almost as if maybe looking closer at him would make the entire scenario make sense.
“What makes you think that I would suddenly tell him?” He asked, keen to know what had been different about tonight to such a degree that Remus worried about that.

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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2022 1:50 pm 

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Remus had spent the walk back onto campus trying to predict the course of this conversation, and yet this had never crossed his mind. The answer Black gave him was frankly bone chilling, beyond what anything Remus could have ever prepared for.
“What did you say?” he asked, his voice flat, barely recognizable as his own. He had heard Black perfectly.
The colour had drained from his face, the frustration giving way for a complete sense of mortification. It didn’t compare to the embarrassment he had felt meeting Black’s eye across the bar earlier tonight, feeling out of his depth, lost at sea.
It had taken Black a single little addition to floor Remus, feeling the balance shift. Within seconds, they no longer entered the conversation with the same knowledge. Remus felt his throat knot up, no longer certain of what Sirius knew, when.


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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2022 2:30 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Somehow the question seemed to clear up even less about Remus’ intentions for the conversation, and Sirius was left wishing that they could have had this conversation in the morning where he’d have a clearer head. Nothing seemed to make sense to Sirius and yet he knew that he had to figure out exactly why Remus had initiated this conversation in the first place.
“I just don’t understand why you think I’d tell on you now,” he reiterated, unsure exactly where he lost Remus, but he was trying to get them back on common ground. He didn’t want Remus to think that this was something that he held over his head as threat, knowing just how much Remus would stand to lose if this somehow got out.
“I’ve seen you at the club so many times before, hell, you’ve seen me at the club so many times before,” Sirius explained, still feeling certain that Remus had to have seen him and recognised him, even if it had been in drag.

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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2022 2:51 pm 

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Remus wished he had gone to bed. Completely depleted from all dopamine, he felt like he had lost brain cells tonight going into this conversation, feeling dumber and more foolish than he had in years.
“No, I haven’t,” he insisted, eyes flickering across Black’s features, finding no recognition there.
Then, almost thoughtlessly, Remus’ eyes dipped to his chest, recognizable tattoos beneath the too-low neckline of his shirt. Black was in a state, too, his hair loose and rumpled. It made Remus’ stomach turn with an odd sense of remorse.
Coming here, Remus knew that, if push came to shove, the sole fact that Black had been in any place to see Remus at work was damning in and of itself. To Remus, Black didn’t exist in that club as anything but a veiled threat, having been prepared to ruin Black’s career, too, although Remus felt certain that his own sins counted double, especially in the eye of a man like Mulligan.
His attention returned onto Black, none the wiser. It didn’t matter. “How long’ve you known?”


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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2022 3:01 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Sirius was having a hard time keeping up with their conversation, unsure how he had managed to misunderstand their situation so completely.
“I don’t know,” Sirius admitted, having not really kept track of the time he had known that his flatmate was an escort, as he had just never really seeing it as either important nor any of his business. “I guess I found out like a week after you moved in or so.”
It was only after saying that that everything seemed to click into place for Sirius.
He had felt so certain that Remus had recognised him, but maybe he has gotten the entire thing wrong. After all, Remus hadn’t exactly known to look for him at the bar and maybe he had just never really laid any attention to the queens.
“Remus,” he started, unsure exactly how to break this to his flatmate. He had only had to tell anyone what he did to earn extra cash once, and with James it had never really felt like a big deal. This though suddenly seemed huge and Sirius was unsure how to proceed.
“I’m sorry, I thought you knew,” he tried, running a hand through his hair as he tried to find the right words for what he wanted to say. “I’m one of the performers at the club.”

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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2022 3:30 pm 

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That was the last straw; Remus barely heard Black beyond him admitting to the fact that he had known for months. Remus wanted to disappear from the face of the Earth, mortified and embarrassed by the fact that he had been so careless, or that it had been that obvious. He felt like death.
“Right,” he fumbled, his voice unsteady, thick in his throat.
He nodded, but it was more a nervous gesture, having to look away from Black. The walls were liquid around them, and though he should feel some sense of reassurance by the fact that Black was in just as deep, Remus was barely able to comprehend it.
He nodded again.
“I’ll better head to bed,” he muttered, turning his face towards Black, though his eyes never really settled on him, barely an acknowledgement.


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PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2022 3:58 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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The night before has been confusing to Sirius and he found that the light of day had done nothing to illuminate his confusion. He had no idea where he stood with Remus now, having not had the chance to talk with him yet, but he felt that what little friendship they might have had was now dangling in a dangerously thin thread.
Having woken up restless, far earlier than he should have woken up given his late night, Sirius had decided to go out for coffee and breakfast. He had a lot of studying to do that day, but he needed to get away a little and be able to clear his head.
It had mostly worked, Sirius already feeling better about the situation, though still unresolved, as he returned to the dorm with a cup of coffee in his hand.
Unsure if Remus was going to be awake yet, he gingerly unlocked and opened the door, having already decided that he was going to take his work to the library of Remus was still asleep.

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PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2022 2:43 am 

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Sleep had come quickly, but it had come dreamless, and by the time Remus woke up he felt just as knackered as he had when he went to bed. The relief of finding the dorm room empty was overshadowed with an ache deep in the back of his throat, still struck with an overwhelming urge to sick up with regret, made just as uneasy by Black’s absence.
Nothing about their conversation yesterday left Remus feeling threatened, certain Black was in an equally compromising situation. What stayed with Remus, a lingering discomfort, was the sudden loss of privacy, the fact that Remus had made that impression on Black far before he had made one academically - and the fact that he hadn’t known that to be the case.
For the life of him, Remus couldn’t think of a time Black had treated him as anything less than his peers, and still Remus felt like their balance had been upturned, leaving him on unsteady ground.
He had been in the middle of packing a bag, standing by his desk and shoving his supplies into his pencil case when the door opened and tension once again got a hold of Remus’ spine.
Hesitantly, he turned, looking at Black over his shoulder.
“Hey,” he greeted with breathless tentativity, feeling uncertain where yesterday had left them.


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PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2022 4:38 am 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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Even if Sirius had known that he ran the risk of Remus being awake when he returned, but now that he was faced with his flatmate awake, he wasn’t really sure how to handle himself.
“Hey,” he said with a soft smile, wanting to be as open and friendly with Remus as possible.
After all, nothing much had changed for him, other than the realisation that Remus likely viewed their dynamic as dramatically different now. Information that Sirius had thought was already common between the two of them had suddenly come to light, and it left Sirius in a weird state, where he wasn’t sure how Remus wanted him to treat him.
“Sleep well?” He asked as he moved to his desk, placing his cup of coffee on the table as he did.

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PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2022 12:09 pm 

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It was immediately obvious that Black was just as far out of his depth as Remus was; Remus happily took advantage of that.
“Yeah,” Remus answered off-handedly, not as dismissively as it was out of disinterest in pretending that Black has asked it as anything but an olive branch, as words to prevent silence to fill the room.
Remus turned properly towards his coworker, hand settling on the back of his chair, expression caught between intentions. His lips parted a moment before speaking, juvenile in its awkward shyness.
“I was just heading out for the library,” he started. If Black had spoke genuinely last night, there really wasn’t any reason for Remus to doubt that Black was able to keep his quiet - he had already kept it for months, after all. It eased some of the stress Remus had felt leaving the bar, but did little to quell the feeling of having been put on display as something for Black to interpret.
Remus had intent on not letting it get to him, much rather taking it in stride, rather than allowing them to fall into a rut they couldn’t get out of. Still, it didn’t bring much confidence to his voice.
“If you’d like to join me.”


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PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2022 12:49 pm 

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

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It wasn’t a huge surprise to Sirius that Remus was heading out, even if they both had had a very late night the night before. What was more surprising to Sirius was the offer for him to join, having felt uncertain just how much Remus was going to want to be around him.
“Yeah?” he asked, not wanting Remus to feel like he had to invite Sirius along. He scanned Remus’ features, trying to see even a flicker of hesitation in his gaze, but he found nothing there.
That brought a wide boyish grin to his lips, feeling much more at ease now that he knew that Remus all east didn’t hate them.
“Yeah, alright, I’d like that,” he added, already feeling a lot better about where the two of them were now than he had in the morning.

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